According to a new study, cats are stupid– for serious. After a study by Britta Osthaus from the Canterbury Christ Church University, she came to this conclusion:

She tested the thought processes of 15 of [cats] by attaching fish and biscuit treats to one end of a piece of string, placing them under a plastic screen to make them unreachable and then seeing if the cats could work out that pulling on the other end of the string would pull the treat closer… but unlike dogs (which Osthaus has previously tested) no cat consistently chose correctly between two parallel strings. With two crossed strings, one cat always made the wrong choice and others succeeded no more than might be expected by chance.

So sorry cat owners. For years you’ve thought your feline friend’s bizarre behavior was “mysterious” or “a sign of independence”, but in reality that weird habit Fluffy has of leaving birds on your pillow is the act of a febrile mind.

So, how does the rest of the animal kingdom rank in the brains department? Here’s the 5 smartest and 5 dumbest animals:

5 Dumb Animals

  1. Cats: For obvious reasons.
  2. Lemmings: Yeah, the whole “they follow each other to their deaths off of cliffs” is a myth, but as our uncle used to say “never let the facts get in the way of a good story.” P.S.: Congrats on negotiating that bank fraud sentence down to six years, Uncle Jim!
  3. Koalas: They lure you into not thinking they’re not dumb because they’re cute, but underneath that cute exterior is a big pile of dumb cultivated by generations of selecting the most slack jawed members of their species to eat  eucalyptus all day.
  4. Rabbits: Have you ever seen a rabbit in a high level calculus class? I thought not.
  5. Apes: They have yet to overthrow humanity despite a clear blueprint being given to them in the form of the Planet of the Apes movies.

5 Brilliant Animals

  1. Dogs: One word: Lassie. Checkmate, cats.
  2. Bald Eagles: They’ve been getting away with one of the worst comb-overs in the history of the world for thousands of years.
  3. Sloths: They manage to live a life where they just eat and literally hang out all day. Genius.
  4. Sharks: They’ve cultivated a reputation for being man eaters despite only eating a few humans every year.
  5. Penguins: They look like they’re wearing tuxedos at all times. Anyone who’s dressed that smart must be.

What do you think the smartest and dumbest animals are? Let us know in the comments!

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